Corrective the Need for Others" Praise

Do you ever find yourself thinking equipment like:

* I"d better give her a call or she will reflect I don"t like her.

* If I do what I want to do he will be mad.

* If I don"t explain for myself they will reflect I don"t care.

* If I wear the same furnish again they will reflect less of me.

And so on....

Do youautomatically change your behavior to try to have some control over what others reflect of you - trying to get praise and dodge displeasure? The need for praise and the fear of displeasure may be running your life, albeit unconsciously. When your sense of safety, value and lovability are tied to what others reflect of you, then you constantly have a crack to look "right" and go "right" in order to have a crack to control what others reflect of you.

Even if, in view of the fact that the very act of making others responsible for your sense of safety, value and lovability is a form of self-abandonment, the more you do it, the more insecure you feel. No matter how much praise you receive, it never heals the inner uncertainty that comes from abandoning yourself.

HOW TO HEAL THE NEED FOR APPROVAL

We all need praise, but we end up depending on others for praise when we do not give ourselves the praise we need.

This thought can be confusing, in view of the fact that many people have learned to give themselves affirmations, which as, "I am perfect," "I am lovable," with no positive effect on their self-esteem. Why is this?

When you give yourself praise from your left-brain planned mind - your ego offended self - you will not believe what you are telltale yourself. You will know that you are "just making it up" so your feeling self, which is your inner child, will not believe you. Your inner child will mainly not believe you if you take up again to handle yourself in unloving, self-abandoning ways, such as judging yourself, ignoring your feelings, turning to addictions, and making others responsible for your self-value. If you tell an actual child that he or she is lovable and perfect, but you ignore the child, mediate the child, give the child cookies and material equipment instead of love, and try to get others to take care of the child, the child will not believe you when you say that he or she is lovable. If you give the child praise AND handle the child in very loving ways, then the child will believe you when you say, "You are so incredible. I love you so much."

Likewise, if you are connected with your Higher Self - your wise and powerful source of love and truth - and you are taking loving action in your own behalf, then your inner child will believe you when you give yourself praise.

Praise and affirmations do not affect the core of you when they come from your ego offended self, but they go severely inside when they come from your Higher Self, and are followed up with loving actions toward yourself.

This is what heals the need for others" praise. Obviously, in order to give this to yourself, you have to be connected with your Higher Self - no matter what that is for you. It may be the peak part of yourself, your experience of God/Goddess, your connection with the universe, and so on. The praise and affirmations need to come THROUGH you from a higher source for your inner child to believe them, rather than from your planned mind.

If you do Inner Bonding, you will discover that your connection with your spiritual Guidance gradually becomes more tangible to you. With this strengthened connection, you will be able to heal your need for others" praise.


Related video:

Healing Your Inner Child - Free Hypnosis Session